Warning: Grandparent posts never-before-seen photos of Grandkids.

Meet Colten, the newest Brasfield.  

Father (Daniel) and son.

Mumzie and Colten.

Grandpa, Uncle Levi, Aunt Kk and Colten.

Aunt Tilley and Colten.

Grandpa and Colten, age 3 weeks.

As you can see, Colten is a precious gift from The Lord.  We are thankful that he is healthy and his mom and dad are well, too.

Here are a few photos of big brother, Drake.

Giving Drake a ride at the circus.

Daniel and Drake at the fall festival at church.

Drake uses The Chair as at the dinner table.


Here are some bonus photos for you.

Mumzie and Colten are content.

I took this from outside the window.



Colten, welcome to The Brasfield Nation.  
We love you very much.

Grandpa
(aka Dadofmykids)

Happy Memories of Baby Georgia

Today I want to share a few precious photos of Georgia Rose.  Today marks six years since she passed.

This first photo was taken the day we brought her home.  Jill wrapped her like a burrito in this home-made crochet blanket.  Who made the blanket?  I don't remember.  Doesn't she look sweet?

Homecoming was so exciting.  Here, Jilly shows off Georgia.  It was a great day for The Brasfield Nation.  We couldn't explain why Georgia brought us so much joy.  Maybe it was because we had come out of a dark period.  You can see the happiness on Jill's face.  There's not a mother on Earth that can take care of a baby better than my Jilly.

Look how little Levi was.  That's his Aunt Sandra holding his hand.  She rightfully wanted to keep him from touching too hard.

Here we are playing cards - probably Go Fish.  Or maybe it was Crazy Eights.  I like it better than Go Fish.  I think Jilly took this photo.  After Georgia died, I was thankful that we had held her so often.

This was also taken the first day.  A few days later, I shaved my beard because I thought my whiskers might be too rough on Georgia's face.  However, I quickly grew it back.

Today, I am able to see the happiness in memories of Georgia.  Other days, memories of her death over-ride.  Please say a prayer for Jilly and me, plus our whole family, today.

God Bless,
Dadofmykids

Day 39 of #40Days - The Chase

There for a while, phone calls from our birth mom were fairly common. Jill said she had given birth to our kids instead of having abortions, so she wanted to share pictures and keep in contact. At first, I didn't quite understand it, but now I see it as an example of Jill's compassion. She is the most compassionate person I've ever known.

Kaymie, one month old, courtesy of birth mom.

When Kaymie was born, the state didn't take her immediately; it was the same as Asher. It is confusing, since they took Riley at the hospital when he was newborn, but we heard that the new baby girl was born and staying with birth mom. We were concerned for Kaymie's health and safety based on the previous experiences. We prayed for her and wondered how she was doing.

After a few months, birth mom called and said she was having troubles with her marriage or something like that and asked us to take Kaymie for adoption. So we went to meet her at a Walmart parking lot. She never showed. We went looking for her, having a general idea of which neighborhood she lived in, we asked people to point us her way, but we didn't find her. We went home, without Kaymie.

This situation repeated itself one more time. We received the phone call asking us to take the baby girl. We went to get her, but no show. This time, the strangest thing happened. We were waiting at Walmart. I was standing outside the store; it was night time. Then birth mom walked directly by me to get a paper out of the paper box beside me, as if she didn't see me or know who I was. But I saw her and the chase was on.

After I said her name, she jumped back in the car her husband was driving and they took off. Jill and I followed. We hoped they would lead us to the baby, whom we didn't see in the car. They soon realized we were following and turned down some back roads increasing in speed. We gave chase thinking this could end badly, like something you'd see on tv, so we slowed down and found our way back to the highway. Again, we wondered where was the baby girl and was she ok.

It was then that Jill and I agreed that we would not go back there again unless it was official. A caseworker would have to call us, not the birth mom. The next call we got came from the birth dad. He was taking Kaymie to the Dept. of Human Services to hand her over. He and the birth mom had been arguing again, so he said he thought this was best for the baby. Still, we waited for the official call which indeed came. Our case worker asked us to drive up there, about an hour from our home, to pick up the baby.

On such short notice, Jill and I couldn't both go this time, so Jill went. When they got home, Kaymie was crying. She had cried all the way home and continued crying till bed time. At seven months old, she didn't recognize any of us. She must have been scared, and probably tired too.

The next morning, when Kaymie woke up, she was in a good mood, not crying. She looked like a different child. Jill had her decked out in a pink sleeper and Kaymie was so cute. I took her picture and printed a few to send with the kids to school so they could show their teachers and friends their baby sister.

Kaymie is a charmer; everybody likes her. She is a kind, helpful, beautiful, smart and athletic girl. We are very proud of her.

God Bless,
Dadofmykids

This is # 39 of Forty Days. Tomorrow is the last post of the series. Learn more here.

Day 36 of #40Days - Highly Favored.

As I type these words, Tucker and Riley are watching our home video from Christmas 2004.  They are glued to the screen, laughing and commenting how little they were and how high pitched their voices were.  As I listen and see their reactions, it makes me happy that we have it.

I had a new camera at the time and enjoyed playing around with it.  As a result, I put together this way-too-long video.  Today, I serve it up as entry number 36.  A special prize goes to anyone who actually watches the whole thing.

The enormous amount of presents and toys may have been a sign of the turbulent times we were having.  Daniel was attending private school in Memphis that year.  Jill was faithful to visit him there and made it possible for him to have Christmas at home in spite of the bad weather conditions.  As I look back on this video, I feel that we may have been trying to somehow make it up to the kids.  We have scaled back since then.

I am thankful that we found so much joy anyway.  It was only by the grace of God.

Have I told you lately what an amazingly awesome wife I have?  She is able to not only care for our kids with so much love, but she does it often in face of the enemy, doing spiritual battle with one hand and teaching home-schoolers with the other.  Then she finds time to treat me like a king and make me feel like I am the one who hung the moon and stars.

He who finds a wife finds a good thing

and obtains favor from the LORD.

Proverbs 18:22

Thanks for tuning in.

God bless,
Dadofmykids

This is post # 36 of Forty Days.  Learn more here.

Day 35 of #40Days - prison babies.

A pregnant relative went to prison. She would be in prison when the baby was born, so she would have to find someone to take the baby or he would be placed into foster care by the state.


She asked us to take him and we did. We went to the hospital shortly after the baby was born and picked him up. It was a joyful occasion that was marred by the situation. But she was scheduled for release in a few months and her baby won't ever remember going home with us.

Jill met another young lady while taking the baby for visits with his mom at the prison. She was pregnant too. She had no one who could take care of her baby. So, for the second time, we brought home a prison baby.

Prison mom number two didn't do as well as the first one. After holding down a job for a few weeks, she returned to the lifestyle that got her in trouble. And she took her baby with her.

While we had him, some of our friends got attached to him. When his mom couldn't continue to care for him, she asked them to take him. Eventually, she allowed them to adopt him.

He is pictured above with our kids and a neighbor.

This true story shows how God can put people in the right place to minister to others. I am proud of how Jilly was willing to foster these two babies so God put one back with his birth mom and the other with his adoptive family.

God bless,
Dadofmykids

Day 28 of #40Days - Little miracles.

"Somebody must be dead", Jill said, because the phone was ringing at 6:00 am.  Then she looked at the caller ID on the phone.  The call was from a pay phone in the town where our kids' birth mom lived.

Asher loves ice cream.

She was calling to tell us that our Asher, five months old, had been taken into DCS custody the previous day.  She told Jill when the case would be before the judge and was nearly begging for us to come and see if DCS would place him with us.  Jill assured her that we would be there, and that we would start making phone calls to our caseworker to see if she could help.

The little things about Asher being placed in our home were most miraculous.  Our home study had expired because we hadn't fostered any more kids since we had a houseful.  We didn't plan on getting more kids either.  But our beloved caseworker went to bat for us, appearing in court and recommending the judge to send Asher home with us.  The lawyer for our region of DCS made a special trip to be there, too.

Asher's caseworker was not the same as our caseworker.  She had made it clear that there was no way we were taking him home that day.  "No way."  But she was wrong.  The judge agreed with those who were there for us.  He said Asher should be with his siblings right away to begin bonding. 

At the campground.

We met his foster parents in the mall parking lot.  That's where we got Asher, at the mall.  He was so sweet and innocent. We were in my pick up truck.  Jill got in the back seat with Asher.  She changed his clothes and buttered him up with lotion because our church was in revival and we planned to be there with him that evening.  Jill's cousin took our other five kids to church and we met them there.  The first time they saw Asher was at church.

About a year later or so, we were camping by the lake.  Somehow, Asher got one of the fishing lures hooked in his lip.  The hook went all the way through the inside of his lip.  I used a pair of pliers to crimp the barb on the hook.  I thought I could then slide it out backwards, but it wouldn't go.  Then I cut the end off the hook with wire cutters.  Thankfully, it wasn't as serious as it first looked.

God bless,
Dadofmykids

This is post # 28 of Forty Days.  Learn more here.

Day 26 of #40Days - Where is her face?!?!

We left Riley with a friend while we went to the hospital for Tilley's arrival.  I admit, it was kinda weird dropping off our little baby so we could go birth another one.

Tilley, first birthday.

Everything went well with Tilley's delivery.  From my perspective, it did.  Jill's epidural didn't work, so she felt the whole thing.

However something kinda strange happened while Jill was pushing.  Tilley's head was crowning.  Then she started to come out.  Her head was far enough out that I started looking for her face, but couldn't find it.  After a minute or so, I began to worry that she didn't have a face at all.  I mean what looked like plenty of hairline to me was out already.  Where is her face?!?!  Suddenly baby Tilley was out entirely, and yes, she had a face now.  Whew! 

After they cleaned Tilley up and gave her to Jill, I called my mom.  She asked me what Tilley looked like.  I said, "She looks like us."  She was a perfect blend of Jill and me, and our families.

Tilley was a crier from the start.  She cried nearly all night that first night in the hospital.  We got no rest at all.  She cried a lot.  For three months she cried and cried and cried.  Then, the day she turned three months old, she stopped crying, unless she had a good reason.  She was a different baby, a happy baby.

It's kinda strange, but colicky babies usually grow out of the frustrating behavior at three months of age.  If your baby is one of these, hang in there.  Be sure your pediatrician knows about all the crying.  You don't want to ignore it, in case something is hurting.  Then, be patient.  That is easy for me to say now.  But do your best to be patient.  In the scheme of things, three months isn't very long.

Later that year, Jill's gynecologist told me that Tilley was a miracle baby.  He said he had seen inside Jill's body during surgeries, and there was no way she could have carried a baby to term.

Jesus looked straight at them and said, 

"There are some things that people cannot do, 

but God can do anything."

Matt. 19:26

God bless,

Dadofmykids

This is post # 26 of Forty Days.  Learn more here.

Day 25 of #40Days - "Wonder Boy"

First birthday.

When we went to hospital to pick up Riley, the first thing the nurse did was show us his full head of hair. He was three days old, a beautiful and healthy baby boy. The state of TN had taken custody of Riley right away after his birth.  We went into the newborn nursery to get him.

We didn't know Tucker's birth mom was pregnant. So Riley came as a complete surprise. The state tries to keep siblings together; so it was natural for them to call us.

Here we were planning for one baby; then one became two.  Tilley was due in a couple weeks. That's why people looked at Jill so funny when she carried Riley out of the hospital; she was waddling.  People were looking, no, staring. We knew they were thinking, "Didn't she take care of that while she was here."

Riley was a good baby.  I nick-named him "Wonder Boy".  He only cried when he was hungry or something like that, slept well.  Everybody wanted to hold him.

I put a blue balloon on the mailbox with a sign that said, "It's a boy."

Babies are truly a gift from the Lord.

God bless,
Dadofmykids

This is post # 25 of Forty Days.  Learn more here.

Day 24 of #40Days - Right on time.

Have you ever heard the song, "He's an on time God"?

Jill told me about a house she saw for sale. She said it was in a nice neighborhood but was probably out of our price range. We had been talking about buying or building a house but agreed it would be better after the baby was born. I guess we thought moving would be easier or safer then.


We decided on "Tilley" and started calling her by her name pretty early. Most people refer to an unborn baby as "the baby". Then after it is born, they give it a name.  Tilley was Jill's maiden name.


It wouldn't hurt, we figured, to look at some houses just to have an idea of what we wanted. So I call the agent who listed the house Jill saw and set up to view a few houses.  The second house we viewed was the one that would be out of our price range.  We only looked at it to get ideas for when we might get serious about buying.  As we finished touring the house, we stepped out the front door.  That's when Jill said something I'll never forget:

"Whatever it takes, get me this house."

There is only one way to answer a statement like that.  "Okay."

Jill has a knack for hearing God when I don't.  I liked the house and all, but was content with the plan as it was.  I didn't know what God had in mind for us and why it was so urgent that we up-size before baby Tilley was born.  Of course, Jill didn't either.  But she was so impressed with the house; she could see us raising our kids there.

The real estate agent was very pleased with herself when we told her we wanted to make an offer.  But our house wasn't even on the market, and we were not able to afford two mortgage payments.  So the purchase of this house was contingent upon the sale of our old house.  As the Lord's timing is perfect, we had recently completed some upgrades and remodeling.  

Once we had a solid contract in place, we listed our house with the same agent, with an exception; my business partner had expressed interest in buying our house as an investment.  She put the "For Sale" sign in the yard.

Then the sellers received another offer which put us in the position of either backing down and letting the house go to another buyer or removing the contingency of selling our house.  We had 24 hours to make our move.  By this point, we were emotionally invested in the new home.  We were able to list all the reasons why we should move, not the least of which was the fact that our house was on a very busy four lane road.

I was frantically trying to figure this out, but as I look back on it, I realize that God was driving this thing: not me.  My partner bought our house right away, and we were back in the saddle.

Moving day was April 12, 1997.  Jill was 8 1/2 moths pregnant with legs swollen so big she could barely walk.  Family and friends came together to help us.  The whole weekend was full of unpacking and trying to find everything.  It was a crazy time for sure.

Then came Monday, and another phone call:

"We know you have your hands full, 

but we have to call you because 

Tucker has a new baby brother."

That's right.  Riley was born, unknown to us, the day after we moved in to the new house.  

This God—his way is perfect; the word of the LORD proves true; 

he is a shield for all those who take refuge in him.

Psalm 18:30

God bless,
Dadofmykids

This is post # 24 of Forty Days.  Learn more here.

Day 21 of #40Days - It turned pink.

We were a family of four: Me, Jill, Daniel and Tucker.  And, we were content.

Somehow, Sharon convinced us that Tucker wasn't going anywhere.  Maybe she did it by taking us to the court hearings regarding Tucker's foster placement.  That's where we first met his birth mom.  It seemed the judge knew her pretty well from previous cases.  Her family was not in a position to petition the court for Tucker like Nathan's family had done.

We were happy.

There was a convention for my industry in Vegas that year.  Mickey kept Daniel while Jill, Tucker and I went to it.  We were driving to the airport when Jill said she was late; I don't mean late for work.

What should we do?  Shouldn't we go to the drug store?

I suggested we wait till we get back from Vegas.  We could take a test after the trip, if nothing changed while we were gone.  Jill agreed.


(This is where you, the reader, imagine the plane taking off in Knoxville and then landing back in Knoxville four days later.)

And, nothing changed.

We stopped by the drug store.

Back home, the test strip turned pink.

:-)

We've kept that test strip fourteen years now.

God bless,
Dadofmykids

This is # 21 of Forty Days.  Learn more here.

Day 19 of #40Days - God smiled on us.

Did you ever own an answering machine?

Tucker.  Photo by Donna Weeks.

We had one.  Every time we would come home, we'd check the machine for messages.  Like today's email, we got a few "spam" callers, or telemarketers.  Bill collectors were either super sweet or downright nasty with their messages.  Only about 1/4 to 1/3 of the messages were really from people we wanted to hear.

Then there was the message from Sharon Smallwood, the caseworker who had listened to us gripe about losing Nathan.  "Jill, this is Sharon.  Give me a call."  It was Thursday before Good Friday.  So we couldn't return Sharon's call till Monday, because the DCS office would be closed for Easter.

We didn't know what she wanted.  But we were NOT expecting this; a baby boy, foster-to-adopt.

Could it be real this time?  Or, was this just another case worker pulling our chain?

The process of picking up a child from foster care can be very surreal.  We picked up Sharon and drove to the TN DCS office in Maynardville.  It was about an hour drive from home.  We had never been there.  So Sharon was giving directions.  Finally, she said, "There it is", pointing to the location.

Inside this little old building was a foster mother who was holding a baby boy that was to be ours.  We were led to a room in the back where they handed him over to Jill; five and a half weeks old, and beautiful.

I asked Sharon how she came to call us for Tucker.  "Isn't there some kind of waiting list?"  We hadn't been waiting very long, in my opinion.

Sharon said, "You were the first ones I thought of when I heard about him."  She told us how she'd told all the other case workers not to make any phone calls because she had a place for him.  I knew then that God had smiled on us.

Smile on me, your servant.
Have pity and rescue me.
Psalm 31:16

God bless,

Dadofmykids

This is day 19 of Forty Days.  Learn more here.

Day 17 of #40Days - The Days Ahead

"The child deserves legal representation, Your Honor."

"You're asking me to spend more tax dollars without good cause."

The judge told me the home study was flawless.  Then, he ruled that Nathan would be turned over to his grandparents.

Outside the courtroom, I tried to tell Nathan's grandparents about their eleven-month-old grandson.  How we fed him, when he slept, and that he loved the backpack.  I could hardly speak because my emotions were getting in the way.

Nathan was our foster son.  We were bonded with this baby boy.  Soon after we got him, our case worker told us that we would be able to adopt him.  We had him since he was about one month old.  Now, our dreams were crushed.  We were crushed.

Jill stayed home with Daniel and Nathan that day while I went to court to ask the judge to assign a guardian ad litem.  It seemed only fair that he should have an attorney who was looking out for his best interest.  It was a conflict, in my opinion, to allow either the state's attorney or the family's attorney to represent him.  And all the judge had for me was, "spend more tax dollars."

I drove home to tell Jill.  Cell phones and text messaging weren't popular yet, and I didn't want to give her the bad news by phone anyway.

We were hurt, and not sure that we even wanted to continue fostering kids.

A few weeks later, another case worker, Sharon Smallwood, came by to check on us.  We unloaded on her.  We told her how we'd been lied to about adopting Nathan, and how the judge was unfair, how hurt we were.  But, she was sweet and took it all in.  She said she didn't blame us for feeling that way.  It helped a little.

We had no way of seeing where this painful experience would lead.  We weren't expecting it to lead any where at all.  But it did; it lead to Tucker.

In the days ahead, I hope to share with you how this painful experience marked the beginning of The Brasfield Nation.

Stay tuned to the 40 Day Project.


God Bless,
Dadofmykids

P.S.  By the way.  Nathan turned out okay, too.  Thank God.

Day 13 of #40Days - "This is bigger than us."

A podcast episode of Daily Audio Bible, included the story of Esther.  Esther was the beautiful Jewish queen of the Persian king Ahasuerus.  You can read the story for yourself in the Bible here.

It moved me on several levels.  So I wanted to share it with you.  First, Esther was adopted by her cousin, Mordecai, after her parents died.  This is a great example of how important adoption can be.  It was Mordecai who advised Esther that this may be the time for which she was created.  If he hadn't adopted her, it's likely they wouldn't have had the relationship where he could say that to her.  Adoption can lead to some pretty cool things.

Secondly, Esther found herself with a decision.  Should she risk her life with hopes of saving her people from genocide, or be silent?  Although we North American Christians don't usually face life or death decisions, we are like Esther in that we are created for a moment in time.

It's cool that we can't usually see times before they arrive.  It's all of a sudden when you're faced with a decision.  Kinda like the day when our social worker called and said, "I know you have your hands full already, but Tucker has a new baby brother.  We have to ask you if you want him."

Adoption Day.

Well, we actually paused to think about that decision.  I mean, we immediately wanted to keep Riley and Tucker together.  But since Jill was 8 1/2 months along with Tilley's pregnancy, and we already had Daniel and Tucker, could we handle it?  And would it have been a blessing to another family if they could have this baby boy, rather than us?

We were made for moments like that.

So be ready.  You probably won't see it coming.  But you will be like Esther, faced with a potentially life changing decision.  Prepare yourself with faith.  Go ahead and determine now that you will trust God.  He can handle it, whether you can or not.

I was nervous.  Picking up baby Riley at the hospital, when Jilly was about to pop with baby Tilley in her belly, was a step of faith.  We were saying to God, "This is bigger than us."

That was 1997.

For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, 

but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, "Abba! Father!"

Romans 8:15

God bless,
Dadofmykids

This is # 13 of The Forty Day Project.  Learn more here.

Day 11 of #40Days - The Backpack

Every one of our babies loved riding on my back in a backpack.  I'll admit, I did a few things with a baby on my back that probably weren't the safest, but no one got hurt.  So don't do anything foolish with your baby.

Nathan was the first to discover the baby backpack.  He was our second foster child.  Jill brought home a backpack she picked up at a thrift store or consignment shop.  By the time Nathan left our home at the age of eleven months, he was so attached to riding in the backpack that he would cry to get in it.

When Tucker came along, I tried him in it, after he was big enough.  The backpack was comfortable for both of us.  So, if any walking was involved, he went on my back.  At the mall.  Mowing the lawn.  Walking the dog.  Just about anywhere.

Riley and Tilley loved it.  But only one at a time could ride.  So we depended on a stroller, too.  Between Tucker, Riley and Tilley, we'd have two kids in a stroller and one in the backpack.

Asher, Kaymie and Levi all rode in backpacks.

Drake is next.  Sadly, all my kids are too big for the backpack these days.  But Drake isn't.  I hope to see him more often and to ride him in the backpack.  Yes, we have one especially for him.   I bought it at a thrift store shortly after his birth.

They like the movement, the view, and the comfort of being close.  If you have a baby, try riding him/her in a backpack.  Sometimes, a fussy kid can be calmed this way.  And it's good exercise.

Matthew 7:11 (HCSB)

If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!

God Bless,

Dadofmykids

Day 9 of #40Days - Man up.

I've seen guys who are proud that they don't change their baby's diapers.  They'll pass a stinky little one off to the wife.  I'm not saying to push anybody out of the way for a chance to change a stinky.  But I am saying, "Man up!"  You can change the oil in your truck and let it run down your arm when you remove the oil drain plug.  You can dig a hook out of a fish's mouth.  But you can't clean poop off your baby or wipe puke up from the floor?

I've been puked on and pooped on more times than I could possibly remember. So the Forty Day project wouldn't be complete without at least one poop story.

Riley and Tilley were infants when the roto virus struck everybody in our house.  Roto virus is a very mean stomach flu.  I happened to be changing the babies' diapers. With a diaper removed, I was hit with a brown blast that soaked me. Fortunately, I was only dressed in a bath robe and underwear.

Then there was that time at Shoney's restaurant when one of the babies puked on me. I finished my meal in my undershirt.

And the time Tucker filled his car seat with a puddle of poop on the way to church. We discovered it as we took him out of the car in the church parking lot. What a mess.
 
Georgia made mustard in her diapers.  It got to where I would lay out newspapers in the floor and put her on them.  It was like a disposable changing pad.

Babies are messy. That's for sure.   But there's nothing sweeter than a baby.

God bless,
Dadofmykids

This is day #9 of 40 Days.